after each line decide whether it is good news or bad news.

- my son went to the bar last night

- he met a girl

- he is taking her out to dinner tonight

- he forgot her name

- he is honey badger about it

saw a free kindle book “how men can please women”.  i knew that was BS because you just can’t please ‘em.  so i downloaded an ebook about desert storm onto her kindle instead.  win-win

i see offers for free kindle books every day.  sometimes i add them to my wife’s kindle without telling her.  i just downloaded an 8 volume series “Lost Tribe of the Sith” onto it.  won’t she be surprised!

it’s like looking into a mirror… a mirror with words on it… true words

what-is-this-i-dont-even:

sofapizza:

don’t forget to cup the trackball.

Basically

if she is alive, there is always a chance. 

i don’t mean viagra, i mean aleve.  her knee hurts all of the time now.  so i’m back to asking if she had her pill before we go to bed

i’m mostly a suit, with some bodyguard, covered in clown

something my sister should have on her car, except without the open spaces

ever notice how old folks use “bless her heart” when they insult somebody.  it gives the impression that they care while giving someone shit.  “that girl is a slut, bless her heart”.  try it!

and thought “so THAT’S what it feels like to have sex with me”.  i was later corrected, apparently it is more seizure than seismic.

smokybanjo:

topherchris:

Basically this.

It’s Effenfish!

why, yes it is!

unicornsexandvomit:

bendthelight:

bugabootaylor:

thefifthhorseman:

elisekari:

bringthebeards:

ha-harto:

My Drunk Kitchen Ep. 4: “Not Easy, Bake Oven”

“I think that we made… biscuits”
Seriously I think she is perfection I need to get drunk with her immediately.

I’m laughing so hard I’m crying. I only cook when I’m drunk. 

This is so glorious I want to cry and then get drunk and do this.

I’m crying. Oh my god, I’m crying

omfg.

the way she put them in the pan.

LMFAO

That made my morning

i thought of so many different people (smoky and grace anyways) while watching this

kristyjoydoyle:

gracenmichelle:

smokybanjo:

EFFEN. FUCKING. FISH.

THIS IS EFFENFISH.

EFFENFISH PHOTO REPLIED.

THIS. IS. EFFEN. FISH.

Most of you won’t understand how amazing this is, so I’ll try to explain…

Back in the DAY, “EFFENFISH” was one of our first commenters. <—not a word?

He is well known in the mydamnchannel community for his harsh yet gentle, loving criticism/words of wisdom.

Until now, we haven’t had any idea what he looks like. I realize that his face is mostly covered but I don’t care. This is epic.

I’m going to go ahead and say it….silver fox? 

thus it continues to be proven that people are happy when i don’t show my face

i sense the mother-in-law had a hand in this

woke up with about 6 inches.  pushed and pushed until i got the white stuff where i wanted it.  then she went to work and i went out to shovel snow.